Trying to be happy

Back in July, my sister approached me and told me her name was being submitted for a promotion.  I happily replied, "That's great!"

To which she replied, "It's in Nashville".   My heart sank.

We are 5 years apart but we are very close.  We even work in the same office for the same company. 

I knew if she interviewed for the position she would get it.  Some time went by and the position seemed to be stalled.  I selfishly gave myself high fives thinking it had fallen through. 

And then she interviewed and she got it.  Just like I knew she would. 

My sister and her family are moving.  She starts her new job on January 14th. 

I'm so torn.  Of course I'm happy for her.  She deserves this.  She has worked hard. 

But I'm also heartbroken.  Aside from college, we've never lived in different states.  And to make things worse, Nashville is a 10 hour car ride away.   Not exactly "weekend trip" material. 

Around the same time, my mom announced they would be retiring at the end of the year.  I don't see my mom regularly but she did live an hour away and we had family get togethers fairly frequently (every 6 weeks or so). 

The stars aligned and they were able to retire a little early on November 30th.   They are now living in their beach house in North Carolina, which is about 6 hours away.

My mom's move has been easier to handle because I knew it was coming.  But, part of me still feels like a little girl who has been abandoned.  My whole family is moving away. I know that's stupid.  In my head I know we'll see each other and it's not like they are gone forever.  Right?

My husband's family is all local and I am close to them but it's not the same.  They aren't my family.  My support system.  I've talked about my husband's depression issues before and I know I could turn to his family if I needed to.  But, they are still his family.  Sometimes you just need to talk and be with people who understand you the best.  Does that make sense?

I'm sure some of you who have always been apart from siblings and/or parents are probably reading this and thinking, "Stop being a baby.  What's the big deal?"

I guess it's all about what you are used to.  I'm used to seeing my sister every day.   She's my lunch buddy, my confidant,  my support system.  She knows me better than anyone. 

That will all be minimized to visits twice per year (summer and Christmas).   Sure we'll still have texting and phone calls.  But, it's not the same.