The following depicts true events of the last 24 hours…
Monday
4:30 – 6:00 pm – Got home from work and decided to re-arrange my home office because I needed to have control over something
6:00 – 7:30 pm – Made chicken flautas and Mexican rice for dinner. Yummy!
7:30 – 8:00 pm – Finish dinner dishes
8:00 pm - Decided to get my mind off things by watching TV. Land on Discovery Health channel and a show called “Medical ER”
8:05 pm – Commercial break. One ad about diapers.
8:08 pm – Show returns
8:15 pm – Commercial break. Another diaper ad AND a pregnancy test ad thrown in for good measure
8:18 pm – Show returns
8:30 pm – Commercial break. This time Brooke Shields shows up and tries to hock Volvos by using babies as a marketing tool. F* YOU!
8:33 pm – Show returns
8:50 pm – Commercial break. The diapers are back.
8:53 pm – Show returns
8:57 pm – Commercial break. Wanna guess? Yep, another pregnancy test.
Alright, assholes! You want an idea for a pregnancy test ad? Here's one for ya!
How about if you feature a woman who has been trying to get pregnant for the last 8 years? You show her going to the drugstore daily to buy pregnancy tests in the hopes that this time, it might, just might be positive.
And the end of the ad? It shows said woman sitting in the bathroom crying because she got another f'ing negative.
And do you know what your slogan could be?
Do ya?
How about "Brand X. The official pregnancy test of infertile women".
9:00 pm – Decide to watch “Dr. G Medical Examiner” on the same channel
9:10 pm – Commercial break. Diapers again.
9:13 pm – Show returns
9:30 pm – Commercial break. Hey! It’s a new ad – no wait, it has a baby in it.
9:33 pm – Show returns
9:47 pm – Commercial break. Any guesses? Yep, Brooke Shields is at it again.
9:56 pm – Show ends and I go to bed where I cry myself to sleep
Note to self: Apparently soon-to-be and existing mothers love shows about weird illnesses, afflictions and autopsies because the advertisers were all over their asses.
Lesson learned? Discovery Health not infertile-friendly.
Tuesday
8:25 am – Driving to work and see 2 women pushing strollers with their oh-so-cute babies inside.
8:35 am – Arrive at work and ride up elevator with pregnant lady
11:15 am – Speak with client on phone and make small talk. She tells me she’s 7 months pregnant with twins.
I did manage to make it home from work without seeing anything baby-related so I'm hoping the last 24 hours of baby sightings was something like seeing locusts. It only happens every 7 years.
Because, seriously.
How many times can one person be exposed to THAT many baby-related things in the 24-hour period after receiving a negative beta?
Oh. I guess the answer would be TWELVE times!
Either I'm being punked or someone is trying really, really hard to get me to lose my freakin' mind.
Well, to whoever you are....
I'm throwing up the white flag. I give up. You win.
7 comments:
Sorry, Suzanne. What a rough couple of days. I hope you get a break from all of the baby-related commercials and pg people...it's just not fair.
I'm new to your blog and am delurking to say that I am so sorry this cycle didn't work out--and for the 8 years of heartbreaking cycles you've had to endure.
We went through 6 years and it was often a dark and difficult place. After my second failed IVF, I don't think I have ever been so bleak and despondent. And it seemed like every storyline of every show (even sitcom reruns) involved a surprise pregnancy. So I feel for you with your last 24 hours and good grief--12 sightings!?!
I know random words from a random lurker can't do much and feel so inadequate. But I also know that so much of the world doesn't relate to this kind of pain and can be so cavalier and dismissive. So, inadequate as I am, I just wanted to be a voice of support saying I DO care; I am rooting for you; and what you are going through IS hard, hard and often isolating stuff.
I wish you all the best. Now is a dark and bleak time, but I sure am holding out hope for you that days of joy are not far. Nurture yourself emotionally and physically.
~Courtney
What's that saying...when it rains, it pours? I'm sorry everything has been hitting you so hard the last few days...it does seem rather unfair that all the baby sightings had to follow on the heals of the beta. :(
I have loved reading your blog for your positive attitude and humor. I wish I could do something to take the pain away for you...don't give up hope, but at the same time, that doesn't mean you have to snap back into hopeful mode right away. Take the time you need, and I really, really hope things will be looking up soon.
Could there be any other options regarding insurance? Somewhere I once read a list of companies whose insurance policies fully cover IF treatments - of course I know a career switch right now might be totally unrealistic, but maybe it could be worth looking into?
I'm really sorry Suzanne. It does seem sometimes that everyone around is pg. It's just so unfair. Hopefully brighter days are in store for you very soon. :)
How are you doing, Suzanne? I've been thinking about you. ((hugs))
I could have written this same post, Suzanne. Isn't just suffocating? Everywhere we look, reminders of the joy everyone else gets to have and more evidence that the world has NO CLUE what it's like to be infertile.
We were watching our beloved Boston Red Sox last night, and we must have seen that fucking Brooke Sheilds commercials four times. I wonder if Brooke was driving a Volkeswaggen the day she wanted to drive into a brick wall with the "baby girl she despised" in the back seat. (This disclosure was in her book Down Came the Rain). Wonder if Volkeswaggen knows about that. Brooke Sheilds of all people should know better than to participate in a stupid commercial that will cause pain to so many of us.
Guess infertiles don't need cars...?
Love your blog!
E
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